Tuesday, December 10, 2002
I think this has been the longest I have ever gone without writing. I have been inundated with life's bullshit and I had a hard time making my way back to this poor lil' journal of mine.
But here I am, back and with a smile on my face.
:-D <---------------- see? smile!
Where to begin....
hmmmmm......
Paul moved back to Boston. Things just didn't work out. He and I found ourselves fighting non-stop, so he cancelled his lease and moved back. It was such a waste of a trip.
hahaha. imagine? Quite the contrary. Things between he and I are going so well and I have never been happier in our relationship. Being around eachother so much has enabled us to really get to know eachother better. Or at least, get to know our relationship better. I am not as much of a bitch as I used to be, I have so much more kindness and patience with him now that I know that I can see him whenever I want, AND most importantly...my love for him grows stronger with each word that comes out of his mouth.
Overall we are much nicer to eachother. He says stupid shit, but then APOLOGIZES for it. In turn, I accept the apology and keep my smart ass retorts to myself. Well, sometimes I let a few slip out, but he handles them better now knowing that there are only a few. He misses me when I am gone during the day. He calls more. It's just SO MUCH BETTER for our relationship now that he lives in NYC.
I told him this morning, that I might not stay there tonight (for reasons which I will explain in a minute) and he was like "Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?" And I said: "Cuz I want to". And he gave me sad face until I left to go to work.
Who replaced my old Paul with this wonderfully sweet person?
I love him.
I was supposed to work last night. But you see...what happened was.....
I told them that my uncle died yesterday. (um!) I know. But I did. I was supposed to work a shift this Friday night from 10pm-7am and I just REALLY didn't want to do it. It kills my whole weekend. AGAIN! And it's CHRISTMAS TIME! AND I HATE THE GAP!
Anyway, since the "funeral" is on Friday, I can't work the shift. They were INCREDIBLY understanding and told me to take last night off too. I got back to Paul's place around 7pm and we had a "toasted almond" and then went to a sushi restaurant.
Ok...Joe CuttheShit doesn't go out for sushi. Joe CuttheShit goes out for McDonald's only. But I went and I tried so many new things and guess what??? I LOVED IT! I had California Rolls (which I knew I liked thanks to Rita) and also I had Philadelphia Maki and Alaskan Maki. Now I know that these are probably the most generic sushi items that you can get, but I still ate them and loved it! They had cream cheese in them for Pete's sake! I thoroughly enjoyed the experience.
Asian people are pretty nice too.
They smile and work fast.
haha.
sike.
hmmmm....
sorta sike.
Paul's roommate, Lisa, went with us and that was interesting. She is a very unique individual. And I don't mean that in a nice way. She's kind of hard to talk to. I mean, she is fine...but definitely gives me some pause. I don't know...it might take time before I fully understand what she is all about. Paul's other roommate, Jen, is unique as well, although "unique" in a way that Lisa is not. But still not in an overly good way.
Do you understand what I am trying to say?
Lisa and Jen are not the devils of doom, but they are definitely not the angels of fun. Hmmm...
I am being very vague about them, but that's because I feel like it's not right for me to judge them yet.
Once I get to know them better I will give a little more detail.
Or at least judge them a little more critically.
hee.
After Sushi dinner, Paul took me over to Pommes Frites and I chowed down on some MAJOR FRIES! I got a "double" and here are the dipping sauces that Paul and I shoved into our mouths: Cheddar Cheese, Ketchup, Tartar Sauce (Paul's horrible pick), Blue Cheese (my wonderful pick), and the best of all Rosemary Garlic Mayo! -----> that one was jizzmatic.
The double size is enormous, but I had no problem fitting in all in my stomach. Even after 15 maki rolls.
And the best part about this wonderful restaurant is that it is right around the block from Paul's apartment! ROCK!
It was quite a wonderful evening. Well, except for the fact that we watched Death to Smoochy, which sucked my asshole dry.
I was in bed by 12am and HAPPILY got to sleep for 8 hours!
I have to call the Gap in a little bit and feel it out. If they tell me to take another night off to "get myself emotionally together" then I totally will! YAY!
I think I was most impressed with the fact that literal tears rolled down my face while I talked to my manager last night. Told you I was a good actor. The gift is still there, even if a little rusty.
Last Wednesday night, Kelly, Rita, Paul and I went out for drinks and had plans to go see the Christmas Tree lighting at Rockefeller. Well, of COURSE by the time we were going to get our drunk asses over there, the roads were all blocked off and we just went home. We had fun any way and Kelly "sexy danced" her night away.
No, I'm not kidding. While acting out our craziness at my apartment, in Queens, Kelly sexy danced in her bra and jeans for at least an hour and a half. She was grinding my leg, the frame to my bedroom door, and Paul until the wee hours of the morning. In between grinding, Kelly would go tearing through the house attacking me from every angle. At one point, she took her nails and dragged them down my neck in typical Freddy Krueger style. Although painful, I laughed my ASS off all night long.
It was amazing fun.
What else big happened?
OH!
On Friday night, Paul, Rita, Mariah and I hung out and had a buh buh buh blast! We were supposed to go the West Village, but ended up at Cedars, this cute hole in the wall for french fries and drinks. Hanging out with Mariah is always amazing. She and I were able to jam out to the Justin Timberlake CD for hours and that is just about my favorite thing to do. Mariah and I always put in our favorite cd and then try to teach eachother new parts to the song, although Mariah is much better at it than I am. She discovers hidden riffs everywhere and I always stand there sheepish.
Paul actually didn't drink much that night and was sober by 2am. I, on the other hand, was buh buh blasted and kept him up until 4:30am with my incessant rambling. At one point, he told me that I always have to be the "life of the party" and that I "don't give anyone else a chance to have the spotlight". That hurt my feelings a bit and I thought about it all day on Saturday. When I got home that night, I apologized to him for doing that and he said that he was sorry for making me feel bad about it.
Paul is not totally right in what he said, but he does have a point. I need to take the step back sometimes. I don't need to be in control of everything. It's hard not to act like that.
I don't know.
I'm not ready to deal with it yet.
so i run away.
but with my spotlight off and my mouth closed.
I will be better.
Okay, I have to go play now. I have spent too much time writing diligently in my journal.
Time to go partake in some sexy talk online.
Then off to have a cigarette, roll with butter, and vitamin water.
Then write in here again.
Then lunch.
Then sexy talk until I spend the last hour of my day doing actual work.
mmmmm....sexy talk.
Promise not to take such a long hiatus next time.
Promise with my entire nut sack.
But here I am, back and with a smile on my face.
:-D <---------------- see? smile!
Where to begin....
hmmmmm......
Paul moved back to Boston. Things just didn't work out. He and I found ourselves fighting non-stop, so he cancelled his lease and moved back. It was such a waste of a trip.
hahaha. imagine? Quite the contrary. Things between he and I are going so well and I have never been happier in our relationship. Being around eachother so much has enabled us to really get to know eachother better. Or at least, get to know our relationship better. I am not as much of a bitch as I used to be, I have so much more kindness and patience with him now that I know that I can see him whenever I want, AND most importantly...my love for him grows stronger with each word that comes out of his mouth.
Overall we are much nicer to eachother. He says stupid shit, but then APOLOGIZES for it. In turn, I accept the apology and keep my smart ass retorts to myself. Well, sometimes I let a few slip out, but he handles them better now knowing that there are only a few. He misses me when I am gone during the day. He calls more. It's just SO MUCH BETTER for our relationship now that he lives in NYC.
I told him this morning, that I might not stay there tonight (for reasons which I will explain in a minute) and he was like "Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?" And I said: "Cuz I want to". And he gave me sad face until I left to go to work.
Who replaced my old Paul with this wonderfully sweet person?
I love him.
I was supposed to work last night. But you see...what happened was.....
I told them that my uncle died yesterday. (um!) I know. But I did. I was supposed to work a shift this Friday night from 10pm-7am and I just REALLY didn't want to do it. It kills my whole weekend. AGAIN! And it's CHRISTMAS TIME! AND I HATE THE GAP!
Anyway, since the "funeral" is on Friday, I can't work the shift. They were INCREDIBLY understanding and told me to take last night off too. I got back to Paul's place around 7pm and we had a "toasted almond" and then went to a sushi restaurant.
Ok...Joe CuttheShit doesn't go out for sushi. Joe CuttheShit goes out for McDonald's only. But I went and I tried so many new things and guess what??? I LOVED IT! I had California Rolls (which I knew I liked thanks to Rita) and also I had Philadelphia Maki and Alaskan Maki. Now I know that these are probably the most generic sushi items that you can get, but I still ate them and loved it! They had cream cheese in them for Pete's sake! I thoroughly enjoyed the experience.
Asian people are pretty nice too.
They smile and work fast.
haha.
sike.
hmmmm....
sorta sike.
Paul's roommate, Lisa, went with us and that was interesting. She is a very unique individual. And I don't mean that in a nice way. She's kind of hard to talk to. I mean, she is fine...but definitely gives me some pause. I don't know...it might take time before I fully understand what she is all about. Paul's other roommate, Jen, is unique as well, although "unique" in a way that Lisa is not. But still not in an overly good way.
Do you understand what I am trying to say?
Lisa and Jen are not the devils of doom, but they are definitely not the angels of fun. Hmmm...
I am being very vague about them, but that's because I feel like it's not right for me to judge them yet.
Once I get to know them better I will give a little more detail.
Or at least judge them a little more critically.
hee.
After Sushi dinner, Paul took me over to Pommes Frites and I chowed down on some MAJOR FRIES! I got a "double" and here are the dipping sauces that Paul and I shoved into our mouths: Cheddar Cheese, Ketchup, Tartar Sauce (Paul's horrible pick), Blue Cheese (my wonderful pick), and the best of all Rosemary Garlic Mayo! -----> that one was jizzmatic.
The double size is enormous, but I had no problem fitting in all in my stomach. Even after 15 maki rolls.
And the best part about this wonderful restaurant is that it is right around the block from Paul's apartment! ROCK!
It was quite a wonderful evening. Well, except for the fact that we watched Death to Smoochy, which sucked my asshole dry.
I was in bed by 12am and HAPPILY got to sleep for 8 hours!
I have to call the Gap in a little bit and feel it out. If they tell me to take another night off to "get myself emotionally together" then I totally will! YAY!
I think I was most impressed with the fact that literal tears rolled down my face while I talked to my manager last night. Told you I was a good actor. The gift is still there, even if a little rusty.
Last Wednesday night, Kelly, Rita, Paul and I went out for drinks and had plans to go see the Christmas Tree lighting at Rockefeller. Well, of COURSE by the time we were going to get our drunk asses over there, the roads were all blocked off and we just went home. We had fun any way and Kelly "sexy danced" her night away.
No, I'm not kidding. While acting out our craziness at my apartment, in Queens, Kelly sexy danced in her bra and jeans for at least an hour and a half. She was grinding my leg, the frame to my bedroom door, and Paul until the wee hours of the morning. In between grinding, Kelly would go tearing through the house attacking me from every angle. At one point, she took her nails and dragged them down my neck in typical Freddy Krueger style. Although painful, I laughed my ASS off all night long.
It was amazing fun.
What else big happened?
OH!
On Friday night, Paul, Rita, Mariah and I hung out and had a buh buh buh blast! We were supposed to go the West Village, but ended up at Cedars, this cute hole in the wall for french fries and drinks. Hanging out with Mariah is always amazing. She and I were able to jam out to the Justin Timberlake CD for hours and that is just about my favorite thing to do. Mariah and I always put in our favorite cd and then try to teach eachother new parts to the song, although Mariah is much better at it than I am. She discovers hidden riffs everywhere and I always stand there sheepish.
Paul actually didn't drink much that night and was sober by 2am. I, on the other hand, was buh buh blasted and kept him up until 4:30am with my incessant rambling. At one point, he told me that I always have to be the "life of the party" and that I "don't give anyone else a chance to have the spotlight". That hurt my feelings a bit and I thought about it all day on Saturday. When I got home that night, I apologized to him for doing that and he said that he was sorry for making me feel bad about it.
Paul is not totally right in what he said, but he does have a point. I need to take the step back sometimes. I don't need to be in control of everything. It's hard not to act like that.
I don't know.
I'm not ready to deal with it yet.
so i run away.
but with my spotlight off and my mouth closed.
I will be better.
Okay, I have to go play now. I have spent too much time writing diligently in my journal.
Time to go partake in some sexy talk online.
Then off to have a cigarette, roll with butter, and vitamin water.
Then write in here again.
Then lunch.
Then sexy talk until I spend the last hour of my day doing actual work.
mmmmm....sexy talk.
Promise not to take such a long hiatus next time.
Promise with my entire nut sack.
